Turmoil in Steve-land

Received an e-mail this weekend that was not intended to go to me.  The email contained extremely sensitive information regarding a company that I work for.  This has happened before, because the owner's name is also "steve" but because he is really old and didn't have a computer for a long time, I got the "steve@blahblah.com" email address.  Its happened in the past that I have received emails intended for him, but they were never anything too serious.  Unfortunately, this email is insanely sensitive, and affects me and the people that I have worked with for the last 13 years.  I can't share what the email is about, but it infuriates me and worries me.  It affects one of my best friends, and might affect his financial situation, which then might affect my financial situation because he was planning on buying my house.  I cannot say anything to anyone about this email, and given some of the details -- it won't matter -- it will be happening very soon.  I hope that it's not as bad of a thing as I fear, but you never know -- in any case.... I hope it will be ok.

I'm a few weeks away from closing on my new house! Can't wait to move! Really should start packing...

My boyfriend and I are doing really well.  I was out of town all last week for work stuff and then I went to Atlanta for a little minor cosmetic surgery.  I got back home Friday night and he came over.  We spent the whole weekend with each other.  It was wonderful.  We watched a few movies together, ate a lot, laughed a lot, and found...other things to occupy our time as well ;)  He is just so right for me-- everything I wanted out of a relationship but never thought was possible to find.

I flipped through some old posts about previous boyfriends last night and there's one from last Spring talking about "L".  It's so funny how I thought that was a "good relationship".  I enjoyed hanging out with him -- we got along fine.  We shared laughs, etc., but I do that with friends.  On the real "relationship stuff" L was not a good fit for me.  He did not communicate well at all -- it made him uncomfortable.  I think that he had a hard time growing up and he learned early that he could put up a tough exterior to shield himself from pain.  I mean I only ever knew that he even actually cared for me a few times in the relationship when he would "slip up" and say something.  We could never have honest conversations.  I dealt with it at the time, because I thought something was wrong with _me_.  But now I know what its like on the other side -- to be able to talk honestly and openly about feelings with a partner.  Also, I knew in that relationship with "L" that I liked him more than he liked me.  I knew there was an inequity.  I'm sure that *never* works in the long term.  If that's how the relationship starts, then it will never change.  It's why guys can't ever "convince" girls/guys to "just give them a shot" etc. If there's no spark-- no chemistry-- no congruence on the personality things that each person needs, then it's just not going to work.  Anyways I'm really thankful that I found Andrew and that he's exactly who he is.  He makes me so happy, and I think I make him really happy too :3

One of these days I'll write a post that doesn't gush on and on about Andrew... but its got to mean something that its been over three months and both of us still feel this way -- I might be even more in love with him now than I was a month ago.  Hard to gauge, because we're in new uncharted territory for me...

Much Love,
Steve